Hello. I'm very tired now honestly, for the past 50 plus hours, I had only slept for not more than 10 hours. In total. Can you imagine how shag can I be? But it's okay, I won't torture myself for losing my beauty sleep anymore. I won't torture myself in any way, anymore. Well, maybe he never ever love me before, maybe he just used me to forget his past, his pain. Okay, actually i'm very disturbed by these, I even wanna hate him just like he do. But, I think clearly, I shouldn't act like him, turn love intro hatred. It's childish thinkings. Just because I annoyed him, and he hate me. I think, doesn't mean he hate me, and I should hate him too. In love, its not tit for tat. I know, and I understand. We're not meant to be, so in the end we still go our own ways, and live separately. I am just wondering, for these 68 days, is he ever serious? I wanted to ask him so much, but I choose not to. It's pointless to do and ask anything right now. He's happy with his life, living happily everyday. I should do the same too. I believe, every break up train human to be stronger. I strongly believe in that. It's ok to fall, but get up quickly after that. People around me and him, tryna help our relationship, but he don't give a damn, so letting go is the only choice. Yeah talk is cheap, its just words, I will do it to prove I am happier than him.

Yeah memories still haunt me sometimes, but its okay, really. To him, i'm just nothing, i'm worse than everyone. As long as I know, I loved him before, we were together for once, its enough.